Friday

I'm little disappointed. I believed that now I have this discipline part in my bag forever. But it looks that I need to be reminded every day so I obey it. Also I think that discipline starts with entry. If I enter before I have some kind of signal just on anticipation it's higher probability that it will be harder for me to get out when I need to.

So I moved stop, averaged and lost. Then I was in recovery mode which also isn't best thing. All in flat, slow downtrend looking for long trade.
From loss of -35 I recovered to -3. First of all I shouldn't have any trade in the first place when things move so slow. Ten minutes for ten pips isn't pace that suits me.
But let's not be bitter at the end of great week profit wise and more importantly discipline wise. Today discipline part get's only two stars.

-3 half size pips

Serious trading

Scalping eur/usd. It didn't want to go down easy. First I had losses but then I recovered with add on to profitable trade. I'm satisfied with this scalping, maybe little to conservative without giving trades room to move. P&l first -6 then +14 = +8

First slip up was in a fact that I entered eur/jpy short without break of previous low. So I was forcing the trade in a delicate moment. Then when it didn't move in my way I didn't know what to do. Best would be to exit, but I gave it a chance because I had strong conviction that usd/jpy will break lower on important level for higher time frames. So I moved my stop for about 5 pips to above previous minor high. Well I got stopped. I was fighting with myself will I move it or not and break discipline, I decided to do it but in controlled manner because it was logical. Anyway, I didn't like that I'm moving stops.
Just as I was stopped market start drift lower, so I reshorted. Well, now when I look at chart I can see that after my entry I didn't get any movement in my direction. So It should have been very short trade. But I let it move against me. I was noticing how I'm not doing what I'm supposed to. I even averaged on idea that it's the top and that i will lose a little more or gain much. Well I was stopped on those two again. Market fell 15 pips after it. My blood was pumping true my body. P&l went from +8 to -15 and finally to -49 pips.
I was aware that I messed up and was cool enough to drop it and don't make mess bigger as I would before in those situation. My interventions against discipline cost me a lot even thou I thought that they are worth it when I made them, well they aren't.

While I was crazed up because ruined day and partially ruined discipline I noticed what was developing in eur/usd. It was yet early to tell but it happened just as I suspected that it could. Move down in eur/usd, eur/jpy and usd/jpy was over and strong reaction to other side was on.
So I entered with one trade, soon other. Run up in eur/gbp was also good indicator. Eur/usd really started to rally hard. My thoughts was that when it break morning high it's going after yesterday's that is 10 pips higher and then who knows where.

I was patient and didn't close for scalp profit nor b/e day when open profit surpassed my previous eur/jpy loss. But I wasn't in the mood to lose that hefty profit either. Gbp/usd wasn't really cooperating in the up move so when it failed on attempt to take out yesterday's high at 73 I was out in next minute. My p&l was happy going from -49 it was up +29 and +32 = +12 pips

Things were not over and I was on the look out for new leg up after retracement. I got good entry and some profit but price shaked me out, too bad. I didn't gave up and my attention was on eur/jpy which became somehow restless and I thought it could lead the move up so I entered long. It started to move and minute later I added long in eur/usd 15 pips higher then my previous exit just minutes before. Move happened but somehow limited without usd/jpy participation on the up side and without it making new high. So again I was protective of my gains and took profit. P&l moved from +12 for a day to +63 pips.
I'm satisfied with trading and my decisions and discipline even with that misstep in eur/jpy. If last two trading days discipline was five starts, today it was between three and four. In the end from -49 I finished 112 pips higher without averaging and high risks. Again it proves that I trade satisfactory when conditions and pace of market are right for me. I just need to recognize when I have that kind of setup in front of me and pass other ones.

+63 half size pips

Action Tuesday

Lot's of market action, twelve trades. I must say that I'm pleased with my discipline part in today's trading. I closed quickly non performing trades. Nice thing was also adding in my direction after third trade. I got caught in nasty spike of +30 pips, my automatic stop got triggered giving me -17. Maybe getting back in was risky trade but it worked nicely giving me biggest individual gain today. While busy with eur/jpy I missed gbp/usd move. I caught only two scalps near the bottom and third was legitimate try for new leg and quick out when it didn't follow thru.

+38 half size pips

Monday

Profitable day without much resistance to my side. Trades just moved in desired direction. One trade in the morning and other after US market open. Bit of bigger risk initiating eur/usd and eur/jpy at the same time. Closed shorts because eur/usd move wasn't convincing just seconds before usd/jpy started going down and dragging eur/jpy. Then took too small profit on the bounce play, it just wasn't fast enough to make me less nervous.

More important is the discipline side of my day. Not much going on to check how I stand with it. Only thing that I can say is that I tightened my stop on last trade to take me out quickly if the move down continue. I'm pretty much determined that discipline is more important then profit from now on.


+45 half size pips (It's now new full size but I will call it like that until the end of month)

In search for discipline

That 1min jump after 11:20 got my hopes high, but it was nothing. I shouldn't be in position but stopped out in the first place. This is tilting. Bright thing is that I made myself leave stop on that last hope trade, I wanted to move it. Unfortunately or fortunately I got stopped on bottom tick.


I will not allow myself this anymore. I simply need to learn to trade. Trading without stops, counting just on a feel isn't for me. Maybe my trading with stops will be absolutely unprofitable. I probably believe so, that's why I don't trade that way. I guess I will have to do it anyway. Maybe it will be constant bleeding. I guess that I'm at the point where that is more interesting and promising than this.

Size is going down, probably I will not put it up for a long time.

Maybe I do have profitable stretches but it's all on back of averaging and running high risk. As I talked with my trading buddy few days ago with that we can never know how good or bad do I trade. It's inconsistent and unmeasurable. This will not be easy for me, maybe it's even impossible. There is now so many years of this kind of trading that I don't know is change for me possible anymore.


Probably I will try to go down the path where discipline will become my new religion. Where exiting at preplanned point will be more valuable then profits. Only that kind of motivation, well some kind, can keep me tick.


-87 pips

Loss

As expected my high point was very brief. After wining trade in eur/jpy I stuck in gbp/usd. I was stiff, couldn't trade properly. Size added pressure and in reality I broke under it.

I don't have any conclusion about it all. If it didn't happen today it would in following days. Well I trade on the edge like every other day, add bigger size and I'm over the edge. In reality nothing new but typical and expected.

Usually after event like this I say to myself go back to scalping. Usually it correct things. Will see. Funny thing is that I never really leave scalping, but in my mind I quit thinking correctly.

-112 pips

Milestone

After my decision to end experiment of one trade a day trading at February 21. it took me 52 trading days to effectively double my account. I did have some withdrawals so it's doubled only if I count them in. I never so far had a streak like that and I always wanted it. So now I accomplished that and feel satisfied and proud about it. It's a fact that this doubling came from deep hole where my account was in February but I'll take it anyway.

Let's get back to today's trading.
New month, new size, double the one of last month. Pressure, but I need to withstand it. Last time when I tried to up my size by 50% I had big difficulty and abandoned trading with bigger size. Nevertheless my size need to grow and I need to get used to it. It's as much a task for me as controlling losses is.
Today I managed that task by entering trades with size that is now new half size. That is helping me, when I say to myself it's a half size I believe it.

My first trade I entered and immediately add new half size position because it started going in my direction. After that first scalp came third trade that wasn't going ok. I averaged because I could afford it trading in half size. Those trades gave me big profit but market didn't break low.
Thirty minutes later I participated in new leg down. Took two scalps and missed the strength of the move. Then I changed my opinion to wrong one and went long because I believed that eur/usd will not go so easy to new low below 1.2142. Then with some averaging in the end I finished it around b/e for those last three trades.

I regret mostly that I'm not able to get out of the first trade with a small loss on a premise that I will add new long trades looking for a bounce. Market is clearly going down and if I believe in a bounce that loss that is getting bigger on first trade is going to drag down my bounce profits. First trade was at 110.16 and if I closed it at 110.00 I would save much of move up needed to make a profit when in the end it came. Better then dragging that first trade in -40 pips loss. There is no problem in looking for a long but I don't have a use of that first trade going so deep in a loss. It's still hard for me to acknowledge a loss and get out.

In the end more then 80 half size pips, so it was a very profitable day especially with size double the one last week.


+43 pips